Wednesday, April 30, 2014

The Sacred Search



This isn't really a book review, as I haven't finished the book yet, but it has to do with the book.
This is totally not the type of book I usually read. It's actually a Bible study. My aunt and cousin asked me and Minion 1 to do it with them, and it's turned out to be way too much fun.
The book is about making sure you're ready for marriage, or dating. Whichever stage of the game you are in. While reading it, there's been some of the obvious things like-
Make sure you're both Christians.

But I've also learned some very cool things that I had never realized before, and I thought I made share them with you, in a more Gospel according to Maddie sort of way.
I'm not currently dating anyone (I've never actually had a boyfriend), but this stuff is good to know whether you're not dating yet, dating, engaged, whatever.

Lesson #1 I learned: Stop with the lists.
I've heard so many girls do this. They make a big list of what they want their perfect husband to be like, and they refuse to date anyone who doesn't meet those exact standards. (I'm not talking like the important things. You shouldn't compromise on them. But some girls will die over a mole hill). This book has helped me realize, that while I have a list for what I want my guy to be like, the guys around me have a list for what they want their girl to be like. Am I living up to that? Not saying I have to be perfect. But neither do the guys. We should both be striving to be the best partner we can be for each other, and not be nit-picky about little things.

Lesson #2 I learned: There isn't just one.
In the book, it told how in ancient times people believed humans used to be just blobs that were both male and female, and because of power struggles, the gods (thank Percy Jackson's grandpa) split them in two- making male and female. The point of this was to weaken humans by making them constantly search for their other half and they would be miserable until they found them. Obviously, this isn't true. The Bible doesn't say anywhere that there is only one man (I'm assuming I have all girl readers, but guys can insert gal) that we can marry and be happy. The Bible actually leads us to believe that there are plenty of perfectly reasonable choices, and when we've considered all the facts (are they a Christian, do we have similar goals in life, can he provide for a family, etc.) it comes down to which one do we like better. (A lot of people will throw out that God specifically chose wives for men in the Bible, but that was only the people in Jesus' family line. Jesus had to have specific lineage, so God chose the husbands and wives.)
Simple isn't it? This was great for me because it has long been my fear that I will marry someone and find out I married the wrong guy and my life will be ruined. Not so people. We could have five guys that are totally the same. Equal spirituality, equal situations. Nothing that screams this is the one God has picked for you. And you know what? We would get to pick the guy we like best, and there wouldn't be this  terror that we made the wrong choice. As long as we are walking in God's will in our life, what we choose will automatically be what he wants for us.

Lesson #3 I learned: Get out and find the guy!
This is another one I've come across a lot. I've read a lot of places where it says its wrong to go looking for a dating partner or spouse. They say that you should wait for God to bring the person.
I'll agree with that to a certain extent. It is wrong to flaunt yourself and throw yourself at people in a desperate attempt to get a relationship. But if you're truly ready to start pursuing a relationship, it makes no sense to not start pursuing. These things literally act like you shouldn't talk to guys, show any interest at all, and just wait for God to drop him in your lap with a ring. Not realistic. We are allowed to get out and meet people and try out relationships (smartly) and move on if its not right.

That's all I got, but I thought you guys might find these as interesting and helpful as I did.

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